I try to eat healthy all the time for gainz, yet I binge drink every week.
I've been wondering this for a while now. Would women be interested in a cuddle buddy instead of a fuck buddy?
I'm still not sure if my roommate realizes he walked in on me masturbating.
I almost filed a police report because I was too drunk to remember where I placed my bike.
I think every professor linear algebra has to be a freak or social disorted in order to be employed.
My first kiss with my crush was during a circle kiss on a cantus table where I kissed her best friend as well and saw her kissing two other girls. Closest I'll ever get to a fourway.
I had sex with an Indian girl and she was very wild, now I am afraid of sex.
One time my brother came to pick me up because I was way too drunk after an exam. He gave me a bucket and put me in his car. People were looking at me disapprovingly so he yelled: 'Chemo is terrible, isn't it?'.
Sometimes I fill the bathtub with tomato sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.
I had sex with a vegetarian. She liked the saussage.
I peed in the vending machine in the communal kitchen when I was drunk.
Coming back from a night out, my buddy and I were walking down the Naamsestraat, shitfaced. We started a fight, with a roadsign. In our defense, the roadsign had it coming.
Once I kissed three girls on New Year's Eve by telling each one of them how magical it would be if we'd be each other's first of the new year. I don't feel bad about it.