I honestly don't know if I want to fuck Conchita Wurst or not. #beardsarehot #milkmoustachesaresexy
I'm a first year master student. The first time I could select Bachelor degree as highest education on a survey, I spontaneously smiled.
Once in Maximo, I bit a girl that was dressed like a strawberry. The Girl left immediatly. #strawberriesareyummie
When I shower, I put conditioner on my balhaar.
I have a 6th sense to always choose the slowest queue in the Colruyt.
A couple of hours ago I broke my weegschaal cause I gained another 5 kg. So I put on my sweatpants and decided to go for a run... to the frituur. #sorrynotsorry
When I go to the toilet, I always use exactly 4 toilet papers. Then fold it twice so it seems there is only one piece of toilet paper left. Next I shove it up my ass and hold it with my sphincter. Then I flex and unflex my sphincter until the paper falls in the toilet. #justgirlythings #kringspierplezier
I went downstairs today and talked to my parents. They seem like nice people.
Studying is so much fun that I volunteered to make dinner with my mom.
When I'm in a fight with my girlfriend, I usually have a 'piemelpauze' before going to her, because otherwise I would excuse myself too fast, just to get sex.
I started wondering why I waste so much time studying to become a bio-engineer, but then I remembered. 'Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.'
When I'm walking home after a partynight I have to pass the bakery. If it's past 5 am, I always look through the basement window, where they are already baking and I ask if there are already some 'pistolékes gereed'. They always give me some for free.
I once bit three girls during a night out in the ambi asking them if I could do a 'Suarezke'. One biting session got pretty intense. She kept wanting it harder and harder. I was banned from the ambi for six months…
Whenever I go to city snack, I always try opening 2 doors. it never works...